7 Smart Woman Ways to Get Him to Notice You (and Appreciate You) More
All relationships go through seasons of easy happy love... and then more difficult seasons where you just don't seem to connect or you can't get him to notice you. Even though the ups and downs are totally normal for a healthy relationship that doesn't mean they're easy.
It also doesn't mean you have to sit back and endure the dark times. If you feel like he doesn't seem to notice you lately, isn't paying enough attention to you, or even if you feel like he's taking you for granted - don't fret.
First, know you are not alone. If these feelings have given you an upset stomach from worry and fear, take a long deep breath and know there is a way forward with him.
It's likely your man has just gotten overly comfortable in your relationship and has simply given up on the courtship. It's not fantastic when men do this, but it doesn't have to mean a red flag that your relationship is coming to an end.
When men feel they've found their mate, or that the relationship is "set" they give up trying to impress you. But... with a little effort on your part, you can get him to court you again!
If you're feeling like you're in a relationship rut where he's just not noticing you like he used to, or if you simply want him to appreciate you more, here are some surefire ways to get what you need.
Remember, this is a common problem women face. Read on to ensure you're being treated well and that your relationship stays fresh and exciting.
7 Smart Woman Ways to Get Him to Notice You (and Appreciate You) More
Appreciate Him Openly to Make Him Feel Masculine Around You
This may sound surprising, but relationship expert James Bauer teaches us most men would prefer to be respected and appreciated than to be loved. That's not to say that love isn't super important for men.
However, men are driven by different motives than women, and they experience love for different reasons.
Remember to tell him how much you appreciate the little things he does, and be really supportive of his goals and aspirations.
There are too many women out there who are trying to change and mold their men into something they are not, so he'll appreciate you as "the one" woman who truly "gets" him if you feed him encouragement, appreciation and respect for who he is.
Don't forget to compliment his physical traits too. Make him feel like a real man, squeeze his biceps or admire the shirt he has chosen for today. He'll love you more for it... especially if he's trying to eat healthy and put in time at the gym.
Oh, and it goes without saying: take great care of yourself. Dress nice, smell good and take care of your health.
Show Him Respect During Conflicts
According to top relationship counselors, the number one relationship killer is contempt.
Conflicts and arguments are a natural part of any relationship, but it's the way that you argue that dictates whether you grow together or whether you grow apart.
Remember to never let contempt, stonewalling or too much blame creep into your conflicts.
(Learn more about Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling in The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. This book is an excellent resource for all couples, not just those that are married.)
Keep yourself grounded by trying to allow him to keep his manhood and self-respect in tact, even through heated arguments.
This will set you apart from any other woman he has ever dated.
Set the Right Tone in the Relationship
If you want to feel special and cherished, then you need to set the tone for this early on and along the way.
Not only does this mean that he needs to know what matters to you, but you need to promote it in how you treat him.
If you aren't being supportive and loving to him, then how can you expect it of him?
Granted we all get busy in our everyday lives, but showing him the love is a surefire way of getting him to show you the same.
Be aware of how you greet him at the end of the day. Are you greeting him with the loving woman he's looking forward to seeing? Are you taking an interest in him and how his day went? Or are you skipping the loving kiss and greeting him with the problems from your work?
What you put out there is what you get back, and this is a perfect example of that. This doesn't mean being clingy or dependent, but rather showing him a mutual love and appreciation.
When you start approaching him and the relationship in this way, it often acts as a nice catalyst to get him to pay attention.
In turn, this often results in a natural appreciation for what he has. Mission accomplished and so simple to achieve!
Show Him What a Great Catch You are by Talking up Some Accomplishments
Sometimes you have to "toot your own horn" so to speak. This doesn't mean that you make up stories to make him jealous, but it does mean that sometimes you have to speak to your own virtues.
The reality is that we all get into a funk or take certain things or people for granted.
He is likely no different as he feels close to you and comfortable, and in the process may have a tendency to forget just how wonderful you are.
It's your job to maintain a very confident front and speak to the many wonderful traits that make you the person that you are.
Be sure to speak about professional accomplishments and personal ones too.
If you get paid a compliment that day, then be sure that he hears about it in a laid-back way.
This isn't to be confused with fishing for compliments, but it also isn't putting yourself down constantly either.
By focusing on the positive aspects of who you are and accepting compliments, he sees a strong and confident woman.
Men love confidence in a woman and are drawn to it.
So when he sees that you know what a great and valuable individual you are, it makes him feel lucky.
He will, in turn, want to shower you with love, particularly if you mix confidence with a positive attitude.
Keep the Romance Alive Always, and Instill the Element of Surprise
Although you may feel that you take any opportunity to be romantic or intimate, this often gets lost the longer you are together.
If you want to feel appreciated, then you need to setup the opportunities to make that happen. Take matters into your own hands to be sure the romance stays alive.
A great date night or a romantic candlelit dinner at home can always help refresh the bond that you share. He will also see that you put forth the effort and will want to return the favor.
Don't always take it upon yourself, but do initiate it. Leave a bit of romance up to him, and, in a fun playful way, tell him that next time it's his turn.
It can be great fun to try and surprise each other and to enjoy romantic evenings or moments when life gets too busy.
Just simple little gestures or time together can really help solidify the bond. This makes him want to keep you guessing, and he'll love to see the smile on your face when he does well!
Tell Him How You Feel, and Show Him What You Need to Feel the Love
Sometimes you just need to confront the situation. We all know that sometimes women have a tendency to be dramatic or even confrontational, but don't fall into the trap this time around.
Level with him at the right time when there are no arguments about anything else. When all is calm and quiet, just tell him that you are not feeling the love.
Although this may seem hard to do, you will be glad that you did.
With most men, it's simply a matter of that little nudge that gets them to stand up and pay attention.
They know that a happy woman means a happy life, so they will work to balance it all out.
Just telling him how you feel may be all it takes to feel a little appreciation and validation.
If you maintain a calm head and composure, he will take it as a discussion rather than criticism.
Appreciation will be yours for the taking. Just be honest, calm and remind him of how much you love him in the process.
This will refresh your relationship and ensure that you can enjoy it together as a team.
Break Through the Toughest Guy's Shell by Enchanting Him and Reach His Heart Deeply
If you're thinking to yourself that every time you've tried to bring him closer and reconnect with his love it seems like he grows more disinterested and more distant, then you need to watch this revealing video that shares how to reach him even if he's currently acting distant or withdrawn.
Whether you're single, married, divorced, looking for love or settled deeply into a relationship you can use this to peek inside the male mind with lessons from women's relationship coach Nick Bastion. Click here to watch the video now.
If men have confused you or he hasn't committed in the way you want him to, or you're afraid he's not in love with you anymore, then you need to watch now:
With it you can bypass his "male defenses" that don't usually let women in, so you can connect with him on a deep level. When you do this he'll practically beg you to be with him forever: Watch it now: